Allisence: Not Saying Goodbye

One of my students has a social/emotional behavior goal that focuses on salutations and valedictions — responding to hellos and goodbyes in an age-appropriate manner. Consequently, we make it a big deal in the classroom for everyone to remember to say hello or goodbye when they enter or leave a room respectively. The funny thing is the one day I really could not bring myself to practice what I preach as my students were walking out the door was on the very last day of school.

The room was already pretty much boxed up thanks to the help of my students, IEP progress reports were sealed in manila envelopes in each of their backpacks, and I was holding on to the small possibility that summer homework would be returned come August though I’m guessing the chances of that are slim. Everything was all set and done.

Their report cards indicated that each of them had been promoted to the next grade; all of them had successfully transitioned into their placements for next year; and somehow amazingly, I had survived my first year of teaching with only a few cuts and bruises; and yet, I could not say goodbye.

Maybe it’s because out of the seven students I ended the year with just last week, only two will be returning to my room at all and even they won’t be in the room all that much. Three of the older boys have moved on and will be home-roomed in the older self-contained classroom next year with significant time in gen. ed. and resource; the class princess, as we affectionately called the only girl in the class, is being moved to another self-contained room at a different school in the district; the one student who just joined our class at the end of April is moving to another district; and the two that are staying with me will be spending the majority of the day in the gen. ed. room, too.

So if you really think about it, I’m getting a completely new class next year and how often does a self-contained teacher say that? And that’s probably the reason behind my inability to say goodbye because I loved my students this year and all the incredible progress they made. What kind of person would want a good thing to come to a close? Not me, that’s for sure.

Besides, Peter Pan always said, “Never say goodbye because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting.” And I most certainly refuse to forget this year.

How about you? Has your school year already come to a close, too, or are you still chugging along like some of the other Reality 101 bloggers? Does saying goodbye get easier with each year in the classroom or is it always this painful? And if it is, how do you cope?

Comments

[L Fuller]

Saying goodbye is never easy. But realizing the impact that you have had on a child's life is the most important. Although, you will miss being a part of this child's life, you were responsible for helping shape this individual. Maybe in the future a surprise visit from this student will happen to let you know how much you did for them. :)

[Drew Rapose]

This was the first year that the kids I began my career with four years ago will graduate. It is kind of bitter sweet. I am happy that they will begin a new part of their lives, but after connecting with them for four years you create a close bond with them. I was able to watch them grow as students and as individuals. Now that schools is out for summer I will take time to concentrate on my studies and reflect back over the year. Reflect on the strategies that were successful and what was not. Did I do my best to prepare my students for their futures?

Next year I will have a new group of freshmen to get to know and work with. Now each year a group of kids I have been working with will graduate and move on to new and hopfully exciting things. I am sure I will still be sad to see them leave but be happy to see them succeed.

[Rhonda]

Hello Lee.

The guy that gave you the push to go back to school is amazing, thanks to you. Even though you may not be "pushing" him in the swings anymore, I have a feeling that you will be "pushing" him through life because of the impact you have left on him.

I truly loved your story.

[Mark Mitchell]

It is amazing how quickly a school year passes and just how fast the time with our students goes. That really emphasizes the importance of teaching with a sense of urgency and with everything we have to offer, each and every day. All children deserve the best we can give them. The more years you teach, the more you know how quickly the years fly by. Each student is so special and has such unique needs that ethically and professionally, we must give them everything we possibly can to make them the best they can be. Enjoy your summer.

[Mark Mitchell]

When you stop and think about it, the time we have with our students if really fleeting. That is why it is so important to teach with a sense of urgency and utilize every available moment to make a difference.

[Kim D]

Allisence, yes, it does get easier to say goodbye with each class. The students' departure from your classroom is a sign of their growth and success. And isn't that what we want for our students? By keeping that in mind, it makes their departure from you easier to accept, sort of like their graduation.

[Lee]

I have a pretty tough goodbye coming after extended school-year. I will be leaving the autistic classroom I have worked in as a paraprofessional for the last few years to leave for student teaching. It's tough as I have seen these students come so far. One non-verbal student now verbalizes asking me for a push on the swings everyday...well, asks several times for a push every day. This is the guy who gave me the push to go back to school to get licensed as a teacher after considering it a few years. I could go on and on with stories for all of the students, but reading your post made me think of his asking for a push and how I won't be pushing him much longer.

It sounds as if your students had ended the year on a successful note. Take pride in that. Good luck next year!